WCT dispenses with mommy

I’ve read it.  I’ve seen it. I’ve heard it. Over and over. I’ve rolled my eyes about it and nodded in patient sympathy.

But today, it happened to me – so you-all get to hear it. Feel free to eye roll and nod.

Today my “big girl” (not yet 23 months old) officially started in the “2-yr old” room at daycare.  She visited all during August, she knows the teachers, we’ve talked about it at home regularly, and chatted with her all weekend about “going to the big girl room” today. We were prepared – or so I thought.

So today, she held my hand as we walked in, bypassed her old room without even a wave, and at the doorway to her new room let go of my hand.  She simply walked in and up to her teacher, and then sat down as directed to start in on a pasting activity.

No “bye mommy.”  No tears.  No hesitation.

Wahhhh. Big girl already. Doesn’t need mommy.
(And I realize that this is only going to get worse!)

Thank you for your patience (and eye rolls).

[Note to self: Try REALLY hard to remember this feeling at 3am tonight when she calls out for mommy and needs me to put her back to sleep YET AGAIN.]

WCT is scary

Just so we’re all clear…we are beginning to be a little weirded out by our 20 month old who can sing the ABCs quite clearly and count up to eleven.  Not just recite up to eleven, but move objects from one place to another while stating a number for each object as she moves it.

Our under two year old who uses prepositional phrases like “Jump on the rug,” and idoms like “Where’d the panda bear go?”

But still won’t sleep through the night by herself, and is still clinging to her last 2 bottles per day.

Who went to the ocean for the first time ever last week and will tell you – spontaneously: “Ocean – [WST] ocean, sandbox, swimming.”  Who has grasped the concept of “home” (“Daddy home,” “Uncle [Lamont] all gone – Uncle [Lamont] his home.”)

Who can clearly say almost all the correct syllables to “Ring around the Rosey, Pocket full of (osey), Ashes, Ashes, we all fall down,”  and invites you to “dance” with her.

Who has begun rejecting the bath, and picking out her own clothes and shoes. Who in 4 short unstructured pool sessions, is able to put her mouth under water and not end up coughing and gagging at least 50% of the time, who can slip under the water and not emerge crying, or gagging (although clearly non-plussed).

Remind me again – was it just a little over a year ago that I was DESPerate for her to finally get beyond the cry, eat, poop stage?  Ye GADS we can’t keep up! 

Welcome to the roller coaster – be sure to put on your seat belts  – ALL of them!

Words update – March 2009

What we are doing now is communicating – and all that implies.  WCB is beginning to state opinions “no, mama, no!”  and hold grudges against the person who made her mad or didn’t listen to her (grudges take the form of pushing you away for an undefined amount of time, so far no more than 15 minutes, and often less than 5).

Here is a list of her expressive vocabulary at this time (to the best of my recollection):

• Animals (14): Kitty, dog, bear, duck, hippo, bird, giraffe, frog, tiger, monkey, armadillo, mouse, moose, turtle.  (bunny, bee, chicken, dino, lion, cow, & gorilla have happened, but not reliably) Can you tell we read a lot of animal books?
• Things(15): ball, box, star,  baby, book,  tree, bath, marker,  pillow,  wagon, car, umbrella, door, potty, stool, balloon, bubbles. (flower, blocks, moon,  blanket, & amber, have happened, but not reliably)
• Clothes(5): sock & socks, shoe, hat, coat. (pants, shirt, diaper have happened, but not reliably)
• Food words(12): Cheese, apple, bottle, cup, water, fish, o’s (cheerios), puffs, banana, chair (highchair only), bread, grapes,
• Body words (13): Toe, eye, ear, nose, mouth, teeth, belly, elbow, knee, back, head, burp (used for all percussive body sounds), & “boh-boh” which is an all encompassing “diaper related body parts” word she seems to have come up with on her own – or at daycare. I think she also knows butt – as in wiggle butt.
• Expressions (9): No, Nah, Yes, uh huh, ow, uh oh, yea, bonk, bop
• Abstract concepts (7): Up, down, upside down, (what’s) this, (what’s) that, more, hot, cold, red, blue, and “poo poo” – meaning, generally, “something in my diaper…maybe.”
• Verbs (2): dance, bite, eat (hand sign only)
• Names (7+): Mama, Dada, Elmo, George (as in Curious), Pooh, Melissa, Ruth, Eva (and reportedly other kids’ names at at school). She has picked up names for Uncle L and Auntie K, and we are working on grandma and grandpa, but have nothing reliable so far.

So that’s like 90 word-sounds she makes that we can decypher, and  so many more that we cannot yet sort out.  And that is up from less than 10 in TWO MONTHS!  Somewhere, I missed that it would be this fast in the childrearing books.

Her receptive vocabulary and understanding is far more advanced. We are starting to be able to use LOGIC in in our conversations with her.  “Shoes & socks?”  “NO shoes!”  “You have to put on shoes and sock to go see grandma – shoes and socks to see grandma?”   [Big smile and nod] “Yes!”

And she can identify the letter O in her books.  Thanks Cheerios!

To PBJ or not to PBJ

 

So – what are folks recommendations on peanuts/peanut butter?

My books say not until 2 years old or older – may trigger peanut allergies.

Her doctor says, after a year, it is up to you – the jury is still out.

As a vegetarian, I’d like to offer PB.

Daycare is happily feeding peanut butter to all the other 1 year olds, except the ONE with a known Peanut allergy.

None of us have ever had a peanut allergy.  We LOVE peanuts.

One year update on MOM

A friend suggested I post a one-year refelctive piece on being a mom.  here, in no particular order, are my thoughts:

My NUMBER ONE observation: At any and every point in the day that you no longer have a child attached to you – take the opportunity to go to the bathroom.  You never know how long it will be until the next opportunity – so take this one NOW – even if you don’t think you need it. Really.  It is MORE important that sleep or food.  Others can feed you, and you can sleep, while you hold the child.  No one can pee for you, and holding a child while on the toilet is… possible, but NOT my first, or second, or third choice.

Do NOT feel guilty for sitting around doing nothing.  I’ll bet the amount of time that I “do nothing” (watch mindless TV, read a book, stare at my navel) is about 10% of what it used to be.  I strongly feel that “doing nothing” is critical to a human being’s sanity.  Stay Sane.  Take “do nothing” breaks. (See my note on health below.)

Take time to cuddle the OTHER loved ones in your life.  I admit to doing poorly at this - I REALLY need to take more personal one-on-one time for my husbands.  I *know* I’m getting some of my needs met by cuddling WCB.  This should NOT be costing my husbands cuddle time as well.  Now the fact that none of us have as much free time – well we’re just going to have to cope with that..

Extra work: WCB hasn’t really had a significant effect on the laundry, in my opinion. But BOY has she increased the dishes!  Bother DaddyN and I prefer to wash her bottles by hand – having suspicions of the residue left by our washing machine. But as she is branching out into baby food and solid food, spoons and bowls and covered plates (for daycare) are starting to really fill up the dishwasher. Plus, in an effort to save $ and make sure mom eats, we are creating and eating a lot of leftovers – increasing the storage containers in the dishwasher. Compartatively, WCB has added one extra washload a week, plus a couple of things added to all other loads. oh, and she has JUST started to make real messes on the floor under her high chair.

What new moms/families need is TIME.  What I am using extra cash for now is buying TIME – babysitting.  I need the new doors painted, the lawn mowed, my kitchen cleaned, my paperwork sorted and filed, my cabinets child-proofed, my cupboards re-arranged…etc. And it costs LESS to pay a babysitter than it does to pay someone to do the other work for me (if they can). I kid you not – I can get baby sitting done for $8-10/hour, and mow my own lawn in 4 hours – $40.  Getting someone else to mow my lawn?  over $100.  Oh sure – one of us can watch her while the other mows the lawn – but that means LESS house/lawn work gets done. A babysitter means ALL of us can get stuff done *at the same time.*  We don’t pay someone so we can go to the movies together- we can get Grandma to watch her for that long – we pay for someone to watch WCB while we CLEAN HOUSE for 5 hours.

Your health is critical.  Do EVERYTHING you can to stay healthy and in one piece.  When Daddy-O hurt his foot, and was told “keep it elevated when possible, keep off it for 6 weeks,” we found that he was almost useless as a caretaker for WCB.  he could not be left alone with her because he couldn’t catch her without the high probability of re-injuring his foot. When Daddy N and I both had awful crippling food poisoning for 3 days, and I was breastfeeding, my biggest fear was that I couldn’t take care of WCB (we did have breastfeeding issues – nothing in there!). I tripped over an ottoman yesterday and Uncle Lamont said, “YOU have a one year old child – don’t you DARE break your leg.” Just becasue I’m not pregnant and have stopped breastfeeding doesn’t mean I can stop doing all those important healthy things.

If you have nothing pressing, enjoy your child (and you really don’t have anything very pressing).  We were unloading out of the car the other day and WCB stopped to investigate the pea gravel in the drive.  I tried to get ther to go into the house - I was eager to start on  our after school (daycare) routine: go in, climb stairs, greet dad, mom changes clothes, WCB removes shoes, play/relax and eventually eat dinner – but she resisted going in.  I tugged again, she sat down on the gravel.  Arms full of stuff to go in the house, I stopped and thought a moment.  In truth, despite my anxiety to move on to the next thing on our list, I had nothing pressing. If WCB wanted to learn about rocks – we could learn about rocks. Down the stuff went, and mom too sat on the gravel. WCB learned that you could dump gravel out of your hands, pile it on your feet, throw it at mom (NO), eat it (NO), squash it with bigger rocks, that it had different shapes and colors, and that it was called “rock” (“rock, rock, yes that’s a rock, thank you for the rock, may I have a rock?, NO, don’t throw rocks…”) My job is to “bring up” a child.  That can happen anywhere, anytime, anyhow.  Every moment is a teachable moment – enjoy them as much as you can.

She is, regularly, a total wonder.  The concept that I created this very independant, intelligent, magical being is just fantastical.  She is so much her own person, at just one year of age, it seems unimaginable that we “created” her.  I feel more that we invited her – that she used to be somewhere else, and now she is here.  Our joy, our responsibility, our stress, our love.  Whew. My mind just reels.

All in all, I think I’m doing OK as a mom.  She is healthy, she’s growning, she’s learning, and she laughs a lot.   Others describe her as a cheery child. Despite our continuing sleep sagas,  eating traumas, and reluctance to wean from the bottle to cup, we’re doing pretty OK.  I’ve bought some new clothes, I’ve dyed my hair, I’ve taken some time for myself  – I’m doing OK.

Check with me in another year – at 2 I might have different news. 

Milestones – 1 year, 2 weeks

WCB had her 12 month check up at the DR yesterday.  Here’s the update:

22 lbs, 30 inches, with a head circumference of 18.5″  This puts her, respectively in the 60th, 75th, and 90th percentiles for a girl.

Dr had clear evidence that her lungs were JUST FINE (she didn’t like being mauled about by a stranger, getting shots or having her finger stuck for a hemoglobin test).  So was everything else.

While we were at the DR, she made a funny sound in her mouth – thinking there was something in there, I poked about and found… A MOLAR…we’ve been waiting for it/them, and I hadn’t checked in the alst few days and there it was several points sicking out of her lower left gum.  I suspect the other side to show up any day the way she has been chewing.

We are currently fascinated with the permutations of in – what fits in other things and how to get things out of other things. And we have a great deal of respect for the Kitty – who occasionally wants to play with her toys.  WCB actually sneaks up when he is not looking and steals her toys back.  Smart baby. A couple of nips, a scratch on her nose and a couple of scratches on her wrist were all it took.

Lastly, she has thoroughly grasped the hand sign for eat.  Yea!  Not so hot, however, on the difference between “eat” and “bottle/drink.” Oh and the word “No” is becoming clearer, as is “AH – dah” for all done, and “Meh Meh” for mom.

Another set of shots at 15 months and then NO MORE until 4-5 years old. YEA!

After long pause – a BIRTHDAY!

Happy birthday WCB! You are now officially ONE!  Walking, climbing, babbling, reasoning, protesting – it is ALL about you!

 Development update on Communication - we have a lot more verbalization, and a lot more use of gestures. We have been, somewhat inconsistantly, trying to teach her baby sign and we are finally seeing her attempt to make signs in return!  WCB has the following vocabulary:

·         “Uh-oh” – I dropped something, you dropped something, or I’m going to drop/throw something.

·         “Da-da, Dah-dah” – greeting for DaddyN or Daddy-O consistently, mom occasionally, and used occasionally in a question tone when dad is not evident (but sounds are heard in the other room), or when dad leaves the room.

·         “Ah-dah” – All done or all gone, in the same sing song tones we use – flip or move hands like we do to show all done

·         “Kkkkk, kah!, kkkkttt,” – Kitty, primarily the stripey cat, but also the back cat or other kitties at other places. But not kitties in photos, interestingly.

·         “UT!” or “UH!” in a commanding tone, generally along with raised arms, means Up – as in “pick me up” or Up – as in “get up and move around please” (while we are holding her) or OUT – as in “I want out of this place” (this is usually accompanied by a gesture in the direction she wants to go).

·         “HAH-eee” or “Heh-woah” – used as a general greeting, especially when playing with a cell phone

·         “Meh, Meh-meh, mah, mah-mah” – used infrequently/inconsistently for “I want mom”

·        “bath hand sign” – used in response to our use at bath time – she is making the gesture in imitation – but clearly knows it means bath.

·         Lots of pointing and then strings of sounds – no idea what she is saying, but clearly she is trying to communicate.

·         Dancing – often with hand gestures – when music is played. She does this while standing, sitting, or in your arms.  Music clearly means “wiggle!”

·         Poking – She has started poking things with one finger, including buttons, and people.  Biting and pinching are still used to get attention – but we’re working on that.

·      “SCREAAAAAAM/Howl” – in the last month WCB has found her opinions.  She wants THIS thing and NO she does not want to give it up. OR She wants MOM and no one else will do.  She has done more crying in the last month than in the previous three.  We are all three having to harden our armor….

·      “Nah, Nahp” - She has just started “refusing” with a single sideways shake of her head and this sound.  usually when eating, but sometimes when a toothbrush is offered, or a comb/brush.  We know she knows what NO means, but it looks like we are going to start hearing “No” said to us frequently and emphatically quite soon!

 

Along with the above -  LOTS of imitation showing up – just this morning she pulled a box partially off the shelf, got out the toy she wanted and pushed the box back in. Previously she would simply have torn the box off shelf and just dumped it.  When she opened her brush and comb present, I brushed her hair to show her what it was. Handed the brush, she immediately brushed her own hair with it!  We’ve also caught her “comparing.”  She got a large bouncy ball for her birthday – and spent quite a bit of time bouncing first it, then other smaller, non-bouncy balls in her room – bounce, no bounce, bounce, no bounce, etc.  She is simply SO fascinating to watch learn!

 Looking at pictures of the “baloney loaf with eyes” from one year ago – it is unbeleivable that this is the same being!  UP the parenting roller coaster hill we go!!!!

Science underlying picky eaters?

This post from Personal Effects/American Farmer crossed my desk today, and while interesting, and something that I can in general go along with , I’d like to see some actual science references to go with it. 

Online research into bitter taste buds anyone?

WCB “ate” her first apples this weekend. On her own she discovered the ones we have delightedly harvested for the first time at this house (no cedar rust this year), and had to be stopped from biting once or twice every apple in the bins.  Given her own apple or 2, she bit, and *chewed* (gummed?) little pieces and “ate” bits of her OWN apples! [And only threw up once.]

This week – bananas, carrots, canned peas and sweet potato pieces are on the list to try as finger foods…

Language Research from Daddy-N

Daddy-N is a news-aholic.  And WCB has been an opportunity for him to research child development stuff galore.  He came up with this cool stuff recently about language development.  In order to respect copyright law, I am unable to paste the specific paragraphs/sections he refers to in his post, and the referenced web page has very sparse navigation options.  I have done my best to direct you to the right parts of this very long article he is talking about.  Enjoy! OLM

 I got curious and googled some on infant language.  Thought I’d share some interesting excerpts from Daniel Kies‘ work below.  WCB seems way ahead of the curve discussed in the chronology listed in this excerpt [5 paragraphs above this section, both physically and linguistically - but there are some interesting findings that could be helpful.  I’m often certain, for example, that WCB is trying hard to tell us things sometimes that we’re just not getting.

I think we should try to pay more attention to one of the points under Communication before Language  [10th - 13th paragraphs under the Crying, Cooing, & Babbling header] that “prosodic” features like pitch & intonation are used much more by infants than the actual consonants and vowels chosen.  They give the example of how for one child “MA-ma” meant “mother” and “ma-MA” meant ‘father” – perhaps WCB is already saying “mother” intentionally by some variation of her “da’s,” and there might even be a distinction already between Daddy-O & Daddy-N somewhere in there.

On the other side of the language equation, the other day I had a profound revelation about just how much language WCB understands, even though she won’t be able to make her own language on the same level for a long time to come.  I told WCB, “you have a sock on your tunnel!” – and she turned to look exactly at the sock on her play tunnel.  Surprised, I decided to test her, and said, “can you bring me the sock?”  And she immediately got the sock and handed it to me!  (And no, I wasn’t using hand gestures or in any way indicating my meaning with hand signals.)*  I find this fascinating especially given that she hardly ever wears socks, and the tunnel is pretty new to her, so both words have sunk in with little apparent effort.

Thus this excerpt about interacting verbally with little’uns [under Preconditions for Language Learning - 3rd-5th paragraphs under the Social Preconditions header] is worth paying attention to soon, as well. It implies that we need to focus on semantic expansion rather than just grammatical expansion when we repeat things back to her. 

*Isn’t Daddy N a proud papa? I think he’s just dying to talk with her. I know *I* wish I could know what she is thinking with that serious little face – or wanting with that frustrated-sounding “DAHT daht DAHT!”    OLM

Life Lessons from Toddlers – #24

A co-worker and I were chatting about how evidently some of our customers and collegues have not yet learned  (or generalized) the issue WCB is currently learning:

Toddler Life Lesson #24: Sometimes the physical world simply does not work the way you want it too.

• You cannot pull your fist with a toy in it through the chair back slots.
• You cannot stand up under your 18′ high activity center
• You cannot fit your round little self through the slot between the bookcase and the ottoman (and thus escape to the rest of the house).
• Going head first off the couch means your head hits the floor first – with emphasis. Gravity works.

And thus applied to the modern workplace: You cannot have high resolution, large sized video on the web with a fast download time.  Sorry – one or the other, but not both.

Interestingly – both WCB and the adults protest in the same way.  They keep trying to make it work their way while whining and protesting a lot.  Also interestingly, I react in the same way: annoyance, amusement, and a certain lack of concern.  Eventually, everyone has to learn that physics is a bitch. (WCB seems to be picking it up pretty quickly – wonder how I get through to the collegues?)